Every book or article I read says something different. One says to let her scream it out, another says to try and figure out what's wrong and address her needs immediately, and yet another says to just wait until she learns to sleep on her own - that it's nothing you can force. I continually return to the feeling that there is no miracle solution. There will be no book that I find that will tell me exactly what she needs, and exactly why she's waking up 10 times a night, and exactly how to get her to sleep at least two hours in a row.
I think I've got pretty good instincts. In fact, I'm sure that most of us do. The trouble may just be thinking that this sleep issue is a problem that has to be solved by employing a series of tactics until your child is trained to know just what to do on their own. I'm not sure I buy that. I'm not sure there's anything I can do that will help her at this point. Sometimes I feel like I just have to think of a reason for her difficulty sleeping - like the fact that she did just get her shots - that could very well be it - but it really didn't make me feel any better at 2:45 am when she started crying for the, wait for it, FOURTH time that hour. I hear her cry, and if I'm particularly annoyed I let out a foul word or two, knowing that it only makes me angrier to hear myself get angry....I stand outside her door, wondering what in the world I'm to do with this little baby who just can't seem to settle down and get into that deep sleep. I pick her up and she's hysterical - unusual since she usually quiets down and falls asleep the moment I pick her up - and I try to think of what might work this time.
The funny thing is, when morning comes around, and by morning I mean a human hour to get out of bed, she perks up and is as sweet as ever upon seeing my and Ryan's faces. She smiles, cooes, says "dadada" and pours out the hugs and kisses. And I fall for it! What can I say? I'm a softie. Even after a series of nights like the past few, I look at her in the morning and am in love all over again. I don't know how my body and mind do it; I don't know how I stay coherent all day; but I do, and I even enjoy my days.I can only hope that this sweet little baby who's sitting in my lap, competing for use of the keyboard and continually turning around to give me big wet kisses, will figure out this sleeping thing soon. And if she doesn't, well I guess I'll just forge on and continue to love her up during the day and practice patience during the night.
It still doesn't stop me from wanting 10 of them.
3 comments:
Well, you've hit the nail on the head. There IS no perfect solution, and all your children will be different. Mine have never really been bothered by their shots, but we started pretty early with being consistent about as much as possible. We were consistent about the routine before bed, and consistent about how we handled them waking in the middle of the night (at age-appropriate times, of course) and we try to be consistent in discipline now that they are getting older. It is SO hard to be consistent, especially at 2am when you are beyond exhaustion and would do ANYTHING for 30 minutes of uninterrupted sleep, including hanging yourself over the back of the recliner and swinging the child from your arms while singing softly if it just meant he/she would stop crying long enough for you to drift off! It makes you willing to do ANYTHING, but sometimes you have to realize that consistency is KEY, and it takes a few times to have it work on the child. Consistency might mean for your child 2 nights in a row, or like for mine, 4 or 5 nights in a row. I am not one to give specific advice, unless it is asked for, but even though both boys are totally different, unless sick they were both sleeping through the night most nights by about 3 months.
Good luck, and stay consistent with WHATEVER you decide to do, whether it's to pick her up when she cries, letting her cry it out, or playing music to put her back to sleep.
Thanks for your encouragement, Adrienne. It's nice to just hear from someone that what we're doing is alright. It feels like we're flying by the seat of our pants...but I guess that's the nature of it, isn't it?
Wow...I'm glad you are all having babies before me. I will have MANY people to ask for advice when my time finally comes! We will pray for you to get some sleep Laura. I think you're a great Mom! You're obviously so in love with your cutie pie!
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