the timid ones...

Before we went to Japan, we had some stereotypes about what the students would be like. We thought they'd be very studious, hard-working, determined to do their best, driven to get top grades, and insanely smart. Some of these things were true, especially with the younger students. The Jr High kids were very determined to get good grades, and they were fairly hard working, but they certainly weren't insanely smart.

I think that's a common misconception about Japan, that the students are far more advanced than our kids here in North America. Ryan and I found them to be quite similar. They are still kids, after all.

One thing that really set them apart though, was their shyness. I had never, and have never since, seen shyness to this extent. Some students, upon being asked a question in front of the class, would just drop their heads and be silent - nothing could get them to look up at you, nevermind answer the question. Some would even cry (thankfully I never had that happen!). Others would cover their faces with their hands and giggle, but not dare to say a word.

I once had a college student who was so shy that I could HARDLY HEAR WHAT SHE WAS SAYING. She was a really nice girl, very kind and warm, but SO DANG SHY.

The college classes were kind of odd because it was a business college I was teaching at, which meant the students were dropping out of the class slowly throughout the semester when they found a workplace where they could do their practicums. It wasn't set up so that they'd finish their classes before they started. So one particular class dwindled so low that I was finally left with this one girl, who's name I wish I could remember. I think it was Tomomi, so let's call her that.

She was a sweet, short, plumpish girl with a shy smile. She had short black hair, cut in a common style seen on college aged girls. She wore her grey business suit, as did many of her college-mates, on days when she'd have an interview or meeting with a potential employer. I remember it being kind of humourous walking into the classroom, lesson ready, knowing there would only be me and her for the rest of the semester.

As winter grew closer, it started snowing, and the sprinklers in the city streets were turned on to keep ice from forming, the semester started coming to a close. It was one of our last classes together that we sat in a corner of the room together, doing an easy worksheet about Christmas and New Years, working through the English ways to explain "how your family celebrates holidays". I was walking her through the sheet, when we came to a certain question.

I read it aloud to her, "How do you celebrate Christmas with your family?"

She thought for a minute, and then mumbled under her breath something that sounded like, "wheeee.....t.....sssssssss...."

I sayz, pardon? I asked her kindly, "What do you do? You.....?"

She repeated it, no louder, "Wheeee.....t.....ssssssss...."

Okay, I had to figure this out. I asked her again, my head bent right down in front of her mouth, "PLEASE SPEAK LOUDER. WHAT DO YOU DO?"

This time I heard it, "we....eat.....susssssssshi."

Aaaah. She eats sushi with her family. Nice. Nice tradition.

Okay, it was time for the next question. "How do you celebrate New Years?"

It started again. "Wheeee.....t.....mtssssssss...."

At least this time I knew what the first part was. "We eat.....what?" I asked, "I can't hear what you're saying." Again, I bent my head down right to her mouth.

"We....eat.....mochi...."

Great. They eat mochi. Well, it was a simple answer, both were, but at least we got there.

The bell rang, and upon her leaving the room I chuckled to myself. What a sweet girl, but SO DANG SHY!!!

I chatted with another teacher at the college at one point during the semester I taught there, and she spoke of Tomomi with great kindness. She said that she was such a nice girl, but so shy. The shyness was apparently keeping her from finding a job. No employer would hire her because she hardly spoke. It was so sad. I couldn't help but wonder what would happen to her. Would she eventually find work? Would someone have pity on her? I was beyond the point where I just thought that the shyness I saw in Japanese girls was something they were putting on. It really was an issue sometimes.

I think of her every now and then. I hope she's doing well. I hope she's found a job. And I hope she's continued to eat ssssssss and mtsssssss in large quantities!!!