throw a wrench in

Do you ever feel like life is really static? Do you ever feel like you're doing the same thing, day in and day out? Ryan and I were talking last night. He was saying how it's sort of weird that he gets up at the same time every morning, showers, eats breakfast, drives to work, walks up the same set of stairs to his office, works all day, drives home, eats dinner, watches tv, goes to bed, and starts it all over the next day.

Okay, that just sounded really extremely boring. There really is more to his life than that routine, but I guess in that moment he was pondering the boring-ness of it all.

There is comfort in routine, though, and I reminded him of how much comfort he actually gets from that. I'm similar, actually. Not quite as in need of routine as him, I think, but I've discovered things about myself recently that have surprised me. Where I thought I was a non-structured free spirit before, I now think of myself as fairly organized and collected. I run quite a steady routine with Plava here at home, and actually find real enjoyment in the comfort of the predictability. There's something nice about familiarity.

I have felt that feeling with various jobs I've held in the past too. At the beginning, there is inner turmoil. I don't know people; I don't know my routine; I don't know my job well; I feel unsure about everything. I am quick to adapt, but until I feel like I've really got my grounding (usually a couple months in) I am rather uneasy going to bed at night. When I reach that point of familiarity, though, it's WONDERFUL. I could go on and on enjoying that feeling. This is what I do; this is how I do it; this is something that I know well.

I suggested to Ryan that he try something that I would probably do if I were feeling how he was, knowing of course that he would likely NEVER do it. I suggested that as he walked up those same stairs today, that he glance around to make sure no one was around, and then to a twirl on the stairs. It's like saying, "TAKE THAT, ROUTINE!!! This day is going to be different!! I'm throwin' a wrench in the daily routine! I'm stepping outside the usual ritual!!" Haha! He laughed, at least!

I notice that Plava is quite keen on routine too. She knows what is going to happen every morning when she wakes up. It will be either mom or dad coming in and getting her out of bed, potty time, snuggle in their bed, get up and dressed, brush teeth, downstairs for breakfast, kiss and hug dad goodbye, potty time....etc. She knows it and asks for it and loves to be comfortable in it. It's nice to see her confidence in what she expects and knows to be familiar. And I like it too. It's good to have a plan, or a grid to fit the day's various activities into. It's good to have that predictability.

So there. Where I once thought I was airy-fairy and easily blown around by whims, I am actually quite structured. My husband is quite structured. My child is quite structured. And it's okay. It's good, even. In fact, it allows me to really appreciate the days when we are a little more free with our plans. Saturdays and Sundays are always up for grabs. We stretch the routine. Naps get delayed, or occasionally skipped. Plans come and go and come again. We stop in to a cafe or friend's house spontaneously, or decide to stay in bed an extra hour, snuggling and goofing around with our wiggly little girl.

All this said, we're on the brink of major change. We'll have a newborn with us, changing our sleeping, eating, living schedules and upturning our tidy little predictable life. But this is okay. Why? BECAUSE WE ARE SO EXCITED ABOUT THIS GIRL ARRIVING!!! It will be well worth the upheaval. Well worth it!!

So welcome, little one. We welcome you whenever you decide to come. We welcome chaos. We welcome the overturning of our daily routines. We welcome the challenge of creating a new life with you included. In 6 short weeks you might just be in our arms! What better reason is there to flip life upside down?