1. Start with a toddler. If you don't have one of your own, borrow one for a couple days from a friend.
2. Send the toddler to play with, kiss, hug, and generally swap germs with any and all children that you know that have been infected with the stomach flu. Also take your child to the kids' play area at the mall where many sick children swap germs.
3. Wait two days.
4. The toddler will become very sick, throwing up and having the runs. Clean up the messes, do the laundry, bring the toddler things to drink, and make sure they're comfortable.
5. Wait two days.
6. You'll start to feel pretty dang nasty, but this is good. The weight loss is just around the corner.
7. When you feel it coming on, hang out in the bathroom. Don't bother leaving to go to the couch because you'll be back in that bathroom in no time. Also, you may feel like passing out on your way to the bathroom so to avoid waking up in your own mess, just make a little home there on the tiles.
8. Naturally, you will not want to eat or drink anything during this phase. Don't force yourself to.
9. Wait two days.
10. On the second day, weigh yourself. POOF!!! 5 pounds - GONE!!
2 comments:
Right on!! I'm already at step 4!! Waahhooo! Goodbye five pounds!
Haha and Boohoo.
Teresa
haha! Although this is indeed a quick way to lose a few pounds, i don't recommend it ;)
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