NEWSFLASH!!! TODDLER SWIPED FROM FAMILY AND REPLACED WITH ALIEN SPECIES!

I'm exhausted, annoyed, frustrated, feeling isolated, and at a loss for words.

So, Plava has turned yet another corner in her crazy toddler life. I don't know what I'd call this corner... the "I'm not going to listen to you - I'll just do whatever I want and if you try to tell me NO then I'll fall on the floor screaming and kicking and the rest of the day I'll wander around talking and acting like a baby with my tongue hanging out."...? Perhaps that's a good name for it.

I hate complaining and being so negative about her, because I love her very much. BUT, this has been a very trying week. THANK GOODNESS, I was saying to Ryan last night, THAT I DO LOVE HER SO MUCH, BECAUSE THIS NEW PHASE COULD MAKE EVEN THE TOUGHEST OF THE TOUGH FEEL LIKE GIVING UP.

First of all, we have a nap time issue. Little Plava has decided that she would stop having her regular 2-hour naps (I know, we were really lucky) and just not sleep at all. She would kick her legs and squirm and refuse to lie down. Then, once she finally did, she would call and call and call until we came in to firmly let her know that it was nap time. This, of course, never worked, and eventually we would give up and get her up, feeling defeated and at a loss as to what to do.

By dinner, she would be utterly exhausted, picking on Pito like crazy, pushing every button known to mankind and breaking every rule we have. Yesterday she topped it off by peeing on the couch. Yes, she's well beyond diapers, and maybe it was her lack of sleep that caused her to forget, or maybe she was testing out what my reaction would be, but after a week like we've had, I had very little to offer her except a new term which she studiously repeated: "frickin' pee". My goodness. Ryan has been coming home to a frazzled, exhausted, at-the-very-end-of-her-rope wife.

Pair the fact that I'm at the end of my patience with the fact that I haven't been getting a nap time break in my day with the fact that I also have a 4.5 month old who wakes up throughout the night, and you've got the recipe for one tired momma.

I'm feeling rather cooped up and lonely lately too. I think part of it is that I'm so darn tired that I just want to go to bed, but there's also the fact that I'm tired enough that getting out of the house (and arguing with Plava over what shoes and sweater she'll wear, and whether or not she needs socks, and what she can or can't bring along in the car) just seems too exhausting. Not only that, but we're trying to really cut corners financially, so the whole "just get out to a coffee shop so I can get a break and a drive" doesn't really seem a good option anymore.

We've tried going to some local playgrounds, and that's good, but what I really feel like me and Plava need is some good hangout time with other people. Plava does SO well when she's playing with other kids. She's entertained, learning lots of things about sharing and playing together, and has so much fun that she happily flits around shouting, "Look Mama!! We're RUNNING TOGETHER!!" It's so fun. I could also really use some time just sitting with other adults. Ack! It gets lonely being home with kids!! I have known this, and have done well for a long time making sure I get out and be with people, but I'm just finding it harder to do recently. I guess it comes back to the whole issue of being so tired that I don't feel like getting us out of the house.

Whew! Well that felt good to get off my chest!! I guess I was wrong in my being "at a loss for words". Here's to hoping tomorrow is a new, slightly better day. :)